Posted by: stiltsville | August 25, 2011

Basic 10-point hurricane survival plan for Yankees

can opener

  1. Get yourself a manual can opener.
  2. Fill the vehicle with gas. Right Now.
  3. On your way home from the gas station, get some cash out of the ATM. Right Now.
  4. You can survive on canned tuna, peanut butter, honey and crackers for way longer than you think. Makes sure you’ve got some. Plus candles and matches. Keep your matches in a ZipLock baggie.
  5. Get a gallon of plain, unscented 5.25% household bleach. 10 to 15 drops is used to purify one gallon of water.
  6. Yard and Trash bags will keep important papers and stuff dry if you lose a roof or window.
  7. Make sure your BBQ grill propane tank is full.
  8. Keep your cell phones on the charger until the power goes out.
  9. Turn your freezer to the coldest setting. Right Now. And pack it with water bottles.
  10. Books, playing cards and board games to keep the kids entertained.
  11. Gather all your extension cords and camping supplies together in one spot.
  12. Don’t stand with your nose against the glass, watching the wind blow stuff around. That’s just stupid. Don’t be stupid.

Yeah, I couldn’t reduce all my hurricane survival tips down to ten, so you got two bonus tips in there…

Here’s the deal: By the time the hurricane gets up to you, the sustained winds should be below 100 MPH. Most likely, you’ll have lots of wind-blown debris, maybe some shattered windows, roof damage and downed trees. And downed power lines.

So your biggest problem will be surviving a few days or a week without power. That’s where the manual can opener comes in. You will need this. When the power goes out, gas stations and ATMs don’t work. Credit and debit cards can’t be swiped. Electric can openers are useless. If you think of it as an unscheduled camping trip, you should come out of it ok. 13) mosquito repellant!



  1. Your forgetting a shotgun to ward off vicious looters.

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